I purchased a new bible. Ever since marrying The Missionary I felt the desire for a new one. I’m a bible-writer. You know, one of those who people who writes in her bible. I underline, highlight, circle, and make notes. Recently I graduated to using Post-Its. This is my third official bible. Oh, there are many bibles in our library, but this is the third one that I live in. Well, if I’m going to be completely honest, I bought two new bibles. Each, like its predecessor, is a different version. NASB, NASB (I got stuck here, bought two back-to-back, so I’m only counting it once.), NIV, NLT, and HCSB. I am a word lover. To me words are much more than a means of communication, in the hands of a master they provide nuance, influence, give depth, highlight, and embellish. They compose imagery to be savored. But I digress.
My new bible(s). Since I do, in a sense, journal in my bibles, I felt that I wanted a fresh blank canvas. I had reached a milestone in my life and was beginning a new journey. I wanted a new bible for the trip. Fresh, crisp, clean pages. No notes that would have me looking back, reflecting on what God had done, the promises He had kept. (Although I do love to peruse my old bibles for just that reason.) Nope, no looking back.
New journey, new title, new responsibilities, new bible(s). New title? Yep, new title. Just like Kate Middleton who went from commoner to HRH the Duchess of Cambridge, I went from widow to The Missionary’s Wife.
When I said ‘I do’ I not only accepted my dreamy rock-of-a-man, The Missionary, as my husband, I also accepted the title of Mrs. The Missionary. (Did you know that the origin of ‘Mrs.’ is that it is the abbreviation of mistress? That would make me The Missionary’s mistress. Better me than someone else.) I’ve been a wife before, so that isn’t my new journey, being The Missionary’s Wife is. And it’s becoming glaringly apparent that I had absolutely no idea what I was getting myself into. Fortunately I know where to find the answer(s). Hence, my new bibles. Yes, one is not enough.
No matter where or what I would read, I always seemed to end up in First or Second Corinthians, so I finally decided to camp there for a while and dig for His treasures. My first hot pink Post-It is smack on the top of the title page of First Corinthians. It’s my subtitle for the book: Making Friends and Influencing People, a How-To Guide. I’m currently on chapter 10 and not so sure I really want to make friends or influence people. This is hard work! There’s too much required of me, too much them and not enough me. I want nothing more than to make friends and influence people for the Lord, but can’t I do it as I am? Won’t they be as enamored with me as The Missionary was, I mean is? Couldn’t You use that me, Lord? It couldn’t have been that bad. Don’t you see the man who fell in love with that?
The Missionary and I have a phrase we use quite often in our conversations, It’s part of the package. I am The Missionary’s Wife. It’s part of the package.
So on a day-to-day basis or an hour-to-hour basis or sometimes even a moment-to-moment basis I remind myself of a few things:
- I chose this.
- Rejoice, this is the exciting part of the journey! I’m in His presence, I’m in His hands, I’m being molded and shaped and created into His masterpiece.
- He loves me.
- He wants what is best for me.
- He knows what He is doing.
- It won’t hurt so much if I don’t resist.